September 2015

We’ve all seen the old classics like the renowned “Carry On” films a hundred times and still buckle over at the same scenes. Guest House Paridiso adopts that similar, slapstick comedy and had me chuckling away throughout.

This typically British comedy is similar to that of an inappropriate Wallace and Gromit without a care for political correctness –which is right up my alley. Our imbecilic protagonists Richie and Eddie attempt to run a, well, run down guest house with sarcasm and violence. If anything, it’s the kind of hotel you’d expect to crop up in Ventnor.

Alongside those characters is Bill Nighy, which makes any film golden.

Simply picture a hell of a lot of f-ing and blinding, unnecessary violence, sexual humour and Simon Pegg playing every character he ever plays, you’ve got yourself a spitting image of this film.

It’s not about showing off the movie’s budget or any Hollywood CGI, the film sticks to the basics of 90s humour. I felt like I didn’t have to worry about strategic product placement or paying copious amounts of attention to the plot, I could just relax and be terribly entertained.

I love an old film that doesn’t take into consideration who it’ll offend and I genuinely enjoyed Guest House Paradiso. Best enjoyed hung over, on a lazy Sunday when you’ve stuffed yourself stupid from a roast, or under the stars as you shall all be doing.

You catch the screening of this film at The Outdoor Cinema on Tuesday from 9pm for just £5. 

By Hollie Hayes

I awoke from a dream to find Fringe a translucent reality.

The clock has been ticking and all has been relatively smooth in the run up this year’s Fringe. In the setup of previous years I’ve seen confusion that rivals that of Noel Fielding Luxury Comedy. But unlike the inner workings of a mad man, there is no confusion this year: the bars are going up and the sky is clear and we’ll have everything ready for you my dears.

However, these cool runnings do invariably mean that the skies are going to fall and the Kraken will awake from its slumber to engulf the entire seafront. Actually, the Kraken is already awake but much more interested in the Observatory bar: we should be fine as long as they don’t run out of rum.   

Colours spread wide among faces unknown and talents I’d only ever pictured in the most outlandishly amusing hallucinations.

It’s the time of year when the giant dream catchers, cacophony of patterns and Shakespeare outfits spread wide across the streets of Ventnor. Every empty building, street corner and bus shelter alive with acoustic resonances and every forgotten corner of the town becomes a hive of activity.

Uncover a woodland scarcely treaded, a landmark turned into bar and this year a prolific society opening its doors to the public for the first time in 150 years. It seems to fit the bill of an exciting week. There is a lot happening this year with almost 400 performers in over 20 different venues.

How could anyone keep track?

Don’t fret my pet, we’ve got it covered. We will be here every day to tell you where the fire is burning and who’s set it alight (hopefully not literally), where to eat the most flavoursome food, buy Ventnor’s beauteous bespoke clothes and who’s currently wearing them.

Additionally if you have any questions for the Fringe Review drop us a message via twitter, Instagram, Facebook or email media@vfringe.co.uk.

We will endeavour to answer your queries with as much sobriety as is humanly possible from the media team.  

Some may be aware that we have a new employee manning the box office desk this year. If you’ve been keeping well-informed you’ll have seen him on our Instagram and Facebook. Oh yes, it’s Dave the Pelican.

Dave the Pelican came to us from… we assume North America due to his species origin, although his accent is open to interpretation. Dave could be from anywhere, after all the eight surviving Pelican species have a sporadic global distribution, generally latitudinal from the tropics to temperate zones.

He is said to have come to us to pursue his passion for marine wildlife, but has somehow found himself working as our office clerk. His qualifications in water wildlife are up for speculation as whatever aquatic creatures he has chosen to research have subsequently disappeared after his examination. ‘Marine biologist’ may be off the cards for this light feathered water bird.

Caution: Dave has been known to refuse the pound sterling and request fish. Please don’t start bringing fish into Ventnor Exchange. Dave is on a diet. 

The most auspicious of all events is the Blind Mole’s Ball.  It seems that this wildly unexpected event has drawn so much attention that it is nearly sold out. While you read this the last ticket may be handed over the counter to its final unknowing contestant.

To say the least I am beside myself with frustration that I am most likely to be confined to the office on this most propitious of events. Those who choose to tread water and indulge themselves in this evening of historic cult following will define this as an experience that should not have been missed.

The evening will commence with a Poirot style investigation and proceed to become a mixture of American sorority phasing and English theatre.

If this ominous description weren’t enough to tempt the wondering mind… the heavens have transmitted the message of this historic meet and are said to shower the skies with a blanket of shooting asteroids on this night. 

I really can’t say more than that.

My possible tip would be to stay calm and wear flat shoes and if you see a mole, approach with caution. 

• “Vintage, Retro & Craft Fair” @ The Winter Garndens – Fri 14th / Sat 15th – 10am – 4pm – FREE FRINGE
• “Lounge Around Town” @ Holy Trinity & The Woodland Bar – Sun 16th – Doors 12pm, Music 1pm – Tickets £12 
• “Pride” Film screening @ St Wilfreds Church – Thurs 13th – 9pm – Tickets £5
• “Seska and The Magic Beard” Kids Comedy Magic show @ The Scout Hut – Fri 14th / sat 15th – 2pm / 4pm – £5
• “Fringe Forum” Creative Debate @ The Woodland Bar – Thurs 13th – 2.30pm – FREE FRINGE 

Happy Monday V-Fringers! We are now less than 24 hours away from kick starting a week of creative madness that is Ventnor Fringe.

My name’s Poppy Janella, local singer-songwriter and fringe fashionista. I’ll be spending my week performing over the four fabulous stages, as well as scouting out the best dressed fringers’ for our daily paper and website. So there really are no excuses – it’s time to grab your glad rags, throw on your summer hat or even rock your nanna’s jumper – you never know,  you may make the front page!

If this sounds like your cuppa’ tea, then take note of my MUST SEE event of the week – “The Vintage, Retro and Craft Fair.” Whether you’re into the rockabilly 50’s, high waists of the 60’s or a big old 70’s platforms, then the craft fair’s old school fashion show is an event not to be missed. Sporting garments from Ventnor’s very own “Oh so vintage…” if you fall in love with something on the catwalk, there’s a good chance you’ll be able to get your hands on it afterwards. 

Just to top it off, the Vintage, Retro and Craft Fair is also a FREE FRINGE event, so whilst on your morning stroll, pop down to the Winter Gardens from 10am – 4pm (fashion show at 11am.) – Fri 14th / Sat 15th and soak up those vintage vibes.

Hullo my darlings! How’s every little thing? Can you believe it has been only one year since I last saw you, I know I can’t, doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun (or lack thereof)! We’ve got a mighty fine line up for you to get your teeth into this year and can’t wait for you to take a good old wholesome bite.

It was Friday night when it finally dawned on me that the Fringe was a mere few days away, a sort of fleeting realisation and pulse of fear having not begun to contemplate what exactly I plan on writing (as you can most probably tell). So this is it, take it or leave it. You have my 95ish% undivided attention for one whole week (here’s the best part) FREE OF CHARGE. Yep that’s right, you heard it here first folks.

If you were with us last year you’ll know exactly how much bloody fun we had. There were laughs, tears, thrills and spills, you name it and we most probably had it. HOLD UP. Check this, this year’s fringe promises to be better and braver than ever before. We’re talking next gen entertainment all up in yo grill.

And maybe, just maybe, if we come together as one, we can make this the greatest celebration of culture the world has ever seen. You’re going to need to trust me on this one.

Mankind — that word should have new meaning for all of us tomorrow. We can’t be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Tomorrow, we celebrate our Independence Day!

Hang on a minute…